By Adam D. Blum, MFT Founder and Director, Gay Therapy Center
It goes without saying that those of us in the LGBTQ+ community have been under just a little bit of stress lately. You’re far from alone if you’ve been worn down, caught up in existential dread, overwhelmed by LGBTQ+ anxiety and politics, and unsure how to answer routine questions like “How are you?” without screaming.
The current administration’s all-out attack on the LGBTQ+ community hasn’t just threatened our rights and existence, but our mental health.
Lori Filocamo — a Gay Therapy Center therapist in Long Island, New York — has been busy with queer clients feeling this distress around LGBTQ+ anxiety and politics.
“Among LGBTQ+ people, there’s a deep anxiety about the possibilities of what’s next and fear of everything that could spiral and go wrong,” she says. “There’s also emotional uproar and anger about how people are allowing certain things to happen.” Filocamo’s expertise lies in trauma and the nervous system, so she’s been helping clients understand how this political stress puts them into fight or flight mode even if they aren’t aware and how to better cope.
Scott Seomin, a Gay Therapy Center therapist in Los Angeles, has also observed how much current politics take a toll on his clients’ mental health. “In an era of heightened political polarization, LGBTQ+ individuals often experience a compounded form of anxiety,” he says.
“This is not only due to general political unrest but also because their rights, safety, and dignity frequently become points of public and legislative debate. While reducing media consumption and ‘doomscrolling’ is helpful, members of our community can take action that can offer deeper, long-term relief.”
Ready for some of that relief? Try this advice for LGBTQ+ anxiety and politics that goes beyond the surface from three expert Gay Therapy Center counselors.
1. Cultivate awareness around thoughts
“Our brain is wired to keep us safe, so in times of stress, it’s often easier to be in our heads and think than to tap into what our body is feeling,” Filocamo says. Scary headlines and fears about losing your rights can set off the brain’s fight-or-flight alarm, which impacts all of our bodily systems. If we’re unaware of this connection, though, we can’t easily calm ourselves down or release or process our emotions.
To build this awareness, Filocamo recommends paying attention to your internal dialogue in a nonjudgmental, observational way. Journaling is one way to do this. She suggests exploring what you’re thinking or feeling, what emotions surface, and where you feel it in your body — without attaching a story or judgment. Then you can begin to recognize patterns and connections, and how they affect you, your reactions, and your relationships.
It can be easy to dismiss the impact of LGBTQ+ anxiety and politics.
But when your brain gets triggered into high stress, your body releases a cascade of hormones like adrenaline or cortisol, Filocamo says. We feel surges of emotions, which she explains are just chemical responses and energy moving through the body. We experience physical sensations; our heart rate or blood pressure might rise, we might feel dizzy or discomfort in our stomach, we might get quiet or loud. In the long run, this often leads to health problems and chronic disease.
The goal of cultivating awareness of this process isn’t to avoid thoughts or emotions, Filocamo says, but to recognize when you get caught up in thought patterns that trigger emotions and physical reactions. When we notice what’s happening, we can learn to slow things down, regulate the nervous system, and lower anxiety. “This can help you get to where news headlines don’t have the same impact on you and become more of an observation,” she says.
2. Reframe your thoughts
On a similar note, Filocamo also recommends cognitive reframing. This is a technique where you identify negative or distorted thoughts and reframe them in a more helpful way.
Here’s her example:
- Original thought: “These political shifts are ruining my life and will take away my rights forever.”
- Reframed thought: “This is a setback, but we have legal avenues to fight and support each other. It’s exhausting but I’ve been through hardship and fought for my rights before; I can get through this too.”
Filocamo notes you don’t have to jump immediately into reframing; it’s still important to identify and acknowledge what you’re feeling. Then you can reframe in order to neutralize lines of thinking that lead to anxiety, regulate your nervous system, and gain new perspective.
3. Identify your true needs
When it feels like the world is on fire, it’s easy to retreat into guilty pleasures, but those might not be the healthiest options. A better way to cope with LGBTQ+ anxiety and politics is to practice checking in with yourself and asking what you really need in any given moment, says Adam Weitz, a Gay Therapy Center therapist in New York City.
Say you’re tempted to scroll through the news (again). Rather than plunging in on autopilot, you’d pause and ask yourself in real time, “What do I need right now?” without judgment. Weitz says you might realize what you really need is some time in nature. Or maybe, he adds, you realize “Right now is a moment when I need to exercise. I know there will be a moment when I do need to pay attention to the news; then I will do that.”
Even if you do decide viewing the news is necessary and manageable, Weitz says you can still use this technique to do it in a healthier, more aware way. For example, he explains, ask yourself how much news you really need, what news you want to consume, and if there’s a form of news (like written vs. video) that’s easier on your stress levels.
The goal is to heighten your sense of awareness and carry it with you throughout the day. “When we’re aware of ourselves in this way, we can make better choices for ourselves,” Weitz says.
4. Turn it into fuel for action
While some people are able to compartmentalize, many of us aren’t willing or able to put our heads in the sand. You can thank evolution for that. “From a psychological perspective, anxiety has a protective role — it alerts us to threats and motivates action,” Seomin says.
Anxiety can be a negative force, especially if it causes extreme distress or impacts our ability to function. In some people or situations, though, it can be harnessed into something productive and healthy.
“For the LGBTQ+ community, we can use political anxiety to spark activism, self-advocacy, or increased connection with community resources,” Seomin explains. For example, he suggests, you could join a local advocacy group; attend rallies; and write your local, state, and federal representatives. You could also consider writing postcards to voters with nonprofit organizations or volunteering with campaigns or causes you believe in.
There’s nothing wrong with cocooning under a blanket with Netflix and snacks (at least sometimes). But channeling that anxiety about politics into actions that directly combat it can give us a sense that we’re doing something about it, while also being in community.
5. Move your body
Somatic work — essentially body awareness— is a tried-and-true method to manage anxiety. “The body is always sensing and feeling, and it often responds to triggers and stress before the mind does, especially if it’s experienced things before,” Filocamo says.
Incorporating somatic exercises “support the brain in shifting the focus to something specific you’re doing with your body rather than getting stuck in thoughts,” she adds. She says a basic foundation of this is breath work, and while there are many techniques, start with becoming aware of how you’re breathing. Are you holding your breath? Is your breathing irregular? Do you breathe more shallowly when you feel anxious? Noticing this and practicing deep breathing exercises can calm the nervous system and racing thoughts.
Filocamo also recommends restorative yoga, a calming practice that blends movement and breathwork to put the body in a relaxed state. Her other suggestions for shifting energy and decreasing LGBTQ+ anxiety and politics include body scanning meditations, emotional freedom technique (EFT, also called tapping), getting a massage, dancing, or even just shaking your limbs.
“When we’re in a stressful state, we’ll sometimes hold our breath and create restriction,” she says. “The intention of somatic work is to open things up to release so we can process and move that energy that’s suppressed out of the body.”
6. Shift your environment
Sometimes it feels impossible to shift our mindset or breathing. In those cases, a literal change of environment can help snap you out of a panic or funk.
“If you’re feeling overwhelmed, step outside of that environment, whether it’s leaving a room or walking outside,” Filocamo advises. “Especially if you’re triggered by something or caught in anxious thoughts, a simple shift to your immediate environment can help move that energy.” She says this could even look like going to a different room or putting on uplifting music; anything to help shift and change your mood and thoughts in a better direction.
7. Connect with community elders
Social connection can be a lifeline during tough times, but reaching across generations offers additional comfort. “Another tool to ease political anxiety is to seek out LGBTQ+ mentors who lived, fought and screamed for gay civil rights since Stonewall — rights that we now benefit from yet we may forget their origins — and we just cannot forget,” Seomin says.
Feeling scared or alone? “Seek out the very people who did not sit idle during the AIDS crisis or the fight for marriage equality,” Seomin adds.” My younger clients who have friendships with older LGBTQ+ people have reported a sense of safety in just knowing their friends’ histories of ‘doing something’ for the community.”
Their existence is also living proof of our community’s resilience and a reminder of our ability to overcome oppression. In a way, Seomin says, you’re honoring your LGBTQ+ elders by getting to know them and what they’ve fought through.
If you don’t already know any LGBTQ+ adults over 50 in your neighborhood, Seomin says, reach out to your city’s LGBTQ+ Center and ask about groups they have for this demographic. Another option is to explore SAGE Tables, a program from a nonprofit that focuses on bringing together the intergenerational LGBTQ+ community.
8. Try therapy (but not just any therapy)
Therapy can be a safe space to process feelings and develop better coping skills. If you’re new to it, though, be aware it comes in a range of philosophies, styles, and schools of thought, and some may work better for you than others.
Weitz notes that some therapists work from a medical model — a consequence of the health insurance industry. While insurance can make therapy affordable for some, it also can result in medicalizing mental health and pathologizing normal feelings, he explains. “I think in this context, it’s dangerous, because it blames the victim — and right now, we as a community are being victimized.”
As a result, he recommends people who are distressed by LGBTQ+ anxiety and politics look for a therapist who doesn’t view your anxiety as just a medical condition or something in a vacuum. He practices Gestalt therapy, which he says recognizes that we live in a larger context, and how we feel is related to those conditions and social components around us. “In this type of therapy, we would recognize it’s normal and healthy for someone to feel anxious right now; it’s appropriate to be scared,” he adds.
While different types of therapy may work better for different people, Weitz believes at this time, queer clients might gain more benefit from working with someone who respects their feelings rather than treating them like a medical condition.
The bottom line
There’s no sugarcoating the trauma, persecution, and subsequent fear and anxiety rippling through our community — one that has already been through so much over the generations. LGBTQ+ anxiety and politics are combination that can cause a great deal of distress.
But we urge our fellow LGBTQ+ community members to hang in there, practice these suggestions, take care of themselves, and consider seeing a likeminded therapist who can help you feel seen, heard, and supported.
Seomin, who has seen the queer community through countless highs and lows over his lifetime, leaves us with this: “Remind yourself that you are safe and loved, and pull your friends in tighter.”
