His therapist challenged Ty’s negative self-talk. He gave him the validation he had never received from his parents. Together, they explored the roots of his inner critic, tracing it to his childhood experiences with his mother, who kept him focused solely on her own needs.
In therapy, Ty essentially learned that his negative messaging was not his own.
With support from his therapist, Ty quickly learned to set boundaries and to express his needs without overwhelming guilt. And he began feel safe enough to risk being vulnerable in his relationships. At work he was able for the first time to tell his clients that he wasn’t able to take on their projects.
Instead of molding himself to what others wanted him to be, Ty began to show up for himself. Not surprisingly, these behavioral changes led to a big reduction in his depression and anxiety.
This kind of rapid change is remarkable—and not typical. Ty benefited from a therapeutic environment that gave him the space and encouragement to examine where his feelings originated. Once he had that information, it became so much easier for him to change his limiting beliefs.
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