“I’m Gay and I’m Boring”

“I’m Gay and I’m Boring”

Some gay men have trouble figuring out what they love.

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The information on this blog is provided for general informational purposes only and no psychotherapist-client relationship is formed nor should any such relationship be implied. The suggestions offered in this blog are just one perspective of many approaches to dealing with problems and should not be your only source when making life decisions. This website is not intended to replace professional mental health treatment.

Growing up a Gay Mormon

Growing up a Gay Mormon

Psychotherapist Wyatt Darling, MFT shares some of his own experiences growing up in the Mormon faith, and his work helping client heals from anti-LGBT religious training.

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The information on this blog is provided for general informational purposes only and no psychotherapist-client relationship is formed nor should any such relationship be implied. The suggestions offered in this blog are just one perspective of many approaches to dealing with problems and should not be your only source when making life decisions. This website is not intended to replace professional mental health treatment.

Gay Guys: Do You Feel Alone?

Gay Guys: Do You Feel Alone?

In therapy, gay men learn to recover from an abusive relationship with their self.

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The information on this blog is provided for general informational purposes only and no psychotherapist-client relationship is formed nor should any such relationship be implied. The suggestions offered in this blog are just one perspective of many approaches to dealing with problems and should not be your only source when making life decisions. This website is not intended to replace professional mental health treatment.

Gay Therapist Reveals: The Top Three Tasks of LGBT Counseling

Gay Therapist Reveals: The Top Three Tasks of LGBT Counseling

Task Three: Love Yourself More Than You Thought Possible

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The information on this blog is provided for general informational purposes only and no psychotherapist-client relationship is formed nor should any such relationship be implied. The suggestions offered in this blog are just one perspective of many approaches to dealing with problems and should not be your only source when making life decisions. This website is not intended to replace professional mental health treatment.

Homophobia As Sexual Abuse

Even if a gay man has not been physically sexually abused, his experience growing up in a homophobic culture can be considered a form of sexual abuse.

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Self-Care is a Big Deal for LGBTQ People

Self-Care is a Big Deal for LGBTQ People

Self-care takes time and attention.  It can be boring.  It’s not sexy or dramatic.  But ultimately it is a super powerful tool for transformation.

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The information on this blog is provided for general informational purposes only and no psychotherapist-client relationship is formed nor should any such relationship be implied. The suggestions offered in this blog are just one perspective of many approaches to dealing with problems and should not be your only source when making life decisions. This website is not intended to replace professional mental health treatment.

How To Grow Gay Self-Esteem

How To Grow Gay Self-Esteem

Here's one thing I've noticed in my work as a psychotherapist. You are really mean.

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The information on this blog is provided for general informational purposes only and no psychotherapist-client relationship is formed nor should any such relationship be implied. The suggestions offered in this blog are just one perspective of many approaches to dealing with problems and should not be your only source when making life decisions. This website is not intended to replace professional mental health treatment.

Secrets of the Gay Inner Critic

Secrets of the Gay Inner Critic

There is an epidemic of unworthiness in our culture. Deep inside so many people feel unlovable.

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The information on this blog is provided for general informational purposes only and no psychotherapist-client relationship is formed nor should any such relationship be implied. The suggestions offered in this blog are just one perspective of many approaches to dealing with problems and should not be your only source when making life decisions. This website is not intended to replace professional mental health treatment.

The Myth of “Hitting Bottom”

The Myth of “Hitting Bottom”

In some cases, including mine, “the bottom” might have been death. 

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The information on this blog is provided for general informational purposes only and no psychotherapist-client relationship is formed nor should any such relationship be implied. The suggestions offered in this blog are just one perspective of many approaches to dealing with problems and should not be your only source when making life decisions. This website is not intended to replace professional mental health treatment.

Gay Men as Outsiders

Gay Men as Outsiders

One of the most enduring societal beliefs about gay men is that they will “grow old alone."

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The information on this blog is provided for general informational purposes only and no psychotherapist-client relationship is formed nor should any such relationship be implied. The suggestions offered in this blog are just one perspective of many approaches to dealing with problems and should not be your only source when making life decisions. This website is not intended to replace professional mental health treatment.

LGBT People: Do You Work All the Time?

LGBT People: Do You Work All the Time?

Life can feel hopeless and meaningless when all you do is work, eat, commute, and do your laundry.

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The information on this blog is provided for general informational purposes only and no psychotherapist-client relationship is formed nor should any such relationship be implied. The suggestions offered in this blog are just one perspective of many approaches to dealing with problems and should not be your only source when making life decisions. This website is not intended to replace professional mental health treatment.

What Is It About Gay Men and Crystal Meth?

What Is It About Gay Men and Crystal Meth?

Meth has long been associated with gay men. The lost inhibitions induced by the drug are in such contradiction to the lifetime of suppression that most gay men have to adopt, that the appeal is magnetic. 

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The information on this blog is provided for general informational purposes only and no psychotherapist-client relationship is formed nor should any such relationship be implied. The suggestions offered in this blog are just one perspective of many approaches to dealing with problems and should not be your only source when making life decisions. This website is not intended to replace professional mental health treatment.

How LGBTQ People Talk to Themselves

How LGBTQ People Talk to Themselves

Would I talk this way to my closest friend?

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The information on this blog is provided for general informational purposes only and no psychotherapist-client relationship is formed nor should any such relationship be implied. The suggestions offered in this blog are just one perspective of many approaches to dealing with problems and should not be your only source when making life decisions. This website is not intended to replace professional mental health treatment.

Compassion Has a Bad Rap

Compassion Has a Bad Rap

Compassion for ourselves does not make us self centered. In fact it has the opposite effect. It makes us more empathic towards others.

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The information on this blog is provided for general informational purposes only and no psychotherapist-client relationship is formed nor should any such relationship be implied. The suggestions offered in this blog are just one perspective of many approaches to dealing with problems and should not be your only source when making life decisions. This website is not intended to replace professional mental health treatment.

Gay Men: Bullying is Bad for the Brain

Gay Men: Bullying is Bad for the Brain

Researchers have discovered that brain chemistry is altered in adults who experienced childhood teasing from peers.

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This Gay Therapist Asks: "Gay Men, How Do You Cross Your Legs?"

This Gay Therapist Asks:  "Gay Men, How Do You Cross Your Legs?"

The habitual self-editing can ultimately lead to an overall feeling of being tired, "less-than", and insecure.

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The information on this blog is provided for general informational purposes only and no psychotherapist-client relationship is formed nor should any such relationship be implied. The suggestions offered in this blog are just one perspective of many approaches to dealing with problems and should not be your only source when making life decisions. This website is not intended to replace professional mental health treatment.

Reflections on Masculinity

Reflections on Masculinity

If market price is a function of supply and demand, then my advice is to start investing in masculinity. That stuff is flying off the shelves. For a variety of reasons—innate and learned—masculinity is like catnip to a significant percentage of gay men, and it appears to be in short supply.

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The information on this blog is provided for general informational purposes only and no psychotherapist-client relationship is formed nor should any such relationship be implied. The suggestions offered in this blog are just one perspective of many approaches to dealing with problems and should not be your only source when making life decisions. This website is not intended to replace professional mental health treatment.

Becoming More Flexible and Living a Life that Matters

Becoming More Flexible and Living a Life that Matters

How do people get stuck? It starts with pain.

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The information on this blog is provided for general informational purposes only and no psychotherapist-client relationship is formed nor should any such relationship be implied. The suggestions offered in this blog are just one perspective of many approaches to dealing with problems and should not be your only source when making life decisions. This website is not intended to replace professional mental health treatment.