I Want An Open Gay Relationship and He Doesn’t

I Want An Open Gay Relationship and He Doesn’t

The biggest fear any human being has in a relationship is the fear that he'll be dropped.  You are playing with this powerful force when you open the relationship. Can you respect the power of this force?

Read More
2 Comments

The information on this blog is provided for general informational purposes only and no psychotherapist-client relationship is formed nor should any such relationship be implied. The suggestions offered in this blog are just one perspective of many approaches to dealing with problems and should not be your only source when making life decisions. This website is not intended to replace professional mental health treatment.

How to Have an Open Gay Relationship That Doesn't Hurt

How to Have an Open Gay Relationship That Doesn't Hurt

I think gay men might be the most sexually creative people in the world. I don’t have any research data to support this, but have you heard of San Francisco’s Folsom Street Fair? It’s the world largest celebration of sexuality, and it was created by gay men.

Read More
Comment

The information on this blog is provided for general informational purposes only and no psychotherapist-client relationship is formed nor should any such relationship be implied. The suggestions offered in this blog are just one perspective of many approaches to dealing with problems and should not be your only source when making life decisions. This website is not intended to replace professional mental health treatment.

The Shy Gay Guy

The Shy Gay Guy

Are you shy? If so, be forewarned: this is not an article about how to overcome shyness.

Read More
Comment

The information on this blog is provided for general informational purposes only and no psychotherapist-client relationship is formed nor should any such relationship be implied. The suggestions offered in this blog are just one perspective of many approaches to dealing with problems and should not be your only source when making life decisions. This website is not intended to replace professional mental health treatment.

The Secret to a Better Gay Sex Life

The Secret to a Better Gay Sex Life

Here’s the big secret to better gay sex:

Be more selfish.

You don’t hear that a lot.

Read More
Comment

The information on this blog is provided for general informational purposes only and no psychotherapist-client relationship is formed nor should any such relationship be implied. The suggestions offered in this blog are just one perspective of many approaches to dealing with problems and should not be your only source when making life decisions. This website is not intended to replace professional mental health treatment.

Gay Men and Perfectionism

 Gay Men and Perfectionism

Being perfect is one way to manage being an outsider in your own family, school, city, or country.

Feeling like an outsider is a pretty typical experience for young gay people. And too often they can also feel like they are gross, disgusting, or sick. It can be quite humiliating to grow up gay.

Read More
1 Comment

The information on this blog is provided for general informational purposes only and no psychotherapist-client relationship is formed nor should any such relationship be implied. The suggestions offered in this blog are just one perspective of many approaches to dealing with problems and should not be your only source when making life decisions. This website is not intended to replace professional mental health treatment.

Can A LGBTQ Relationship Survive an Affair? A Video Blog

Can A LGBTQ Relationship Survive an Affair?  A Video Blog

Recovery from an affair is a lot of work. But it happens every day at the Gay Therapy Center. See how in this 5-minute video.

Read More
Comment

The information on this blog is provided for general informational purposes only and no psychotherapist-client relationship is formed nor should any such relationship be implied. The suggestions offered in this blog are just one perspective of many approaches to dealing with problems and should not be your only source when making life decisions. This website is not intended to replace professional mental health treatment.

Gay Men Being Needy

Gay Men Being Needy

If a man appears dependent or needy, then he’s a fag. It’s considered gross.

Read More
8 Comments

The information on this blog is provided for general informational purposes only and no psychotherapist-client relationship is formed nor should any such relationship be implied. The suggestions offered in this blog are just one perspective of many approaches to dealing with problems and should not be your only source when making life decisions. This website is not intended to replace professional mental health treatment.

Why Am I Attracted to Younger Gay Men?

Why Am I Attracted to Younger Gay Men?

As a gay man you have already spent years judging your sexuality. That didn't make you any happier.

Read More
7 Comments

The information on this blog is provided for general informational purposes only and no psychotherapist-client relationship is formed nor should any such relationship be implied. The suggestions offered in this blog are just one perspective of many approaches to dealing with problems and should not be your only source when making life decisions. This website is not intended to replace professional mental health treatment.

Video Blog: How to Reduce Fights in Your LGBTQ Relationship

Video Blog: How to Reduce Fights in Your LGBTQ Relationship

In this 6-minute video, Adam D. Blum, MFT, the Founder of the Gay Therapy Center, reveals how to reduce fights with your partner by understanding what is really going on beneath the surface of the fight.

Read More
Comment

The information on this blog is provided for general informational purposes only and no psychotherapist-client relationship is formed nor should any such relationship be implied. The suggestions offered in this blog are just one perspective of many approaches to dealing with problems and should not be your only source when making life decisions. This website is not intended to replace professional mental health treatment.

Isolation and the LGBTQ Experience

Isolation and the LGBTQ Experience

You’ve heard it before. Modern life can be a lonely place.

Most people are struggling with this, but LGBT people can feel especially isolated.

Read More
Comment

The information on this blog is provided for general informational purposes only and no psychotherapist-client relationship is formed nor should any such relationship be implied. The suggestions offered in this blog are just one perspective of many approaches to dealing with problems and should not be your only source when making life decisions. This website is not intended to replace professional mental health treatment.

Do You Love a Gay Narcissist?

Do You Love a Gay Narcissist?

Many of my clients fall in love with narcissists. It's pretty easy to do. Narcissists often are extremely charming, bright, and attractive.

Read More
32 Comments

The information on this blog is provided for general informational purposes only and no psychotherapist-client relationship is formed nor should any such relationship be implied. The suggestions offered in this blog are just one perspective of many approaches to dealing with problems and should not be your only source when making life decisions. This website is not intended to replace professional mental health treatment.

Why Is My LGBTQ Partner So Annoying?

Why Is My LGBTQ Partner So Annoying?

Sometimes love gets very crowded.

For most couples, there are more than two people in the relationship. There’s you, and your boyfriend, but there is also your parents and his parents. And perhaps even a few grandparents.

Read More
Comment

The information on this blog is provided for general informational purposes only and no psychotherapist-client relationship is formed nor should any such relationship be implied. The suggestions offered in this blog are just one perspective of many approaches to dealing with problems and should not be your only source when making life decisions. This website is not intended to replace professional mental health treatment.

When You Want More Gay Sex Than He Does

When You Want More Gay Sex Than He Does

In a long term relationship it’s likely that one of you will want sex more frequently than the other. This can create uncomfortable conflicts. Here are some ideas that can help you manage your differences.

Read More
3 Comments

The information on this blog is provided for general informational purposes only and no psychotherapist-client relationship is formed nor should any such relationship be implied. The suggestions offered in this blog are just one perspective of many approaches to dealing with problems and should not be your only source when making life decisions. This website is not intended to replace professional mental health treatment.

Why Do We Fight Over Dumb Stuff?

Why Do We Fight Over Dumb Stuff?

When your partner shouts:

“You didn’t text me that you’d be late!”

The translation is:

“I feel abandoned and alone.”

Read More
Comment

The information on this blog is provided for general informational purposes only and no psychotherapist-client relationship is formed nor should any such relationship be implied. The suggestions offered in this blog are just one perspective of many approaches to dealing with problems and should not be your only source when making life decisions. This website is not intended to replace professional mental health treatment.

This is Why Coming Out is Important (Even After You’ve Come Out)

This is Why Coming Out is Important (Even After You’ve Come Out)

Why do you always hear that it’s important to come out?

The reason that it is very hard to love yourself fully when you hide. And it’s very hard to love others when you don’t love yourself. Therefore, the closet is lonely. No one loves you there.

Read More
Comment

The information on this blog is provided for general informational purposes only and no psychotherapist-client relationship is formed nor should any such relationship be implied. The suggestions offered in this blog are just one perspective of many approaches to dealing with problems and should not be your only source when making life decisions. This website is not intended to replace professional mental health treatment.

Gay Midlife Crisis: It’s a Thing

Gay Midlife Crisis: It’s a Thing

Therapists don’t often share their own life stories. Our focus is on you, not us. But sometimes what we’ve learned from our personal challenges can inspire our clients.

Read More
1 Comment

The information on this blog is provided for general informational purposes only and no psychotherapist-client relationship is formed nor should any such relationship be implied. The suggestions offered in this blog are just one perspective of many approaches to dealing with problems and should not be your only source when making life decisions. This website is not intended to replace professional mental health treatment.

What Is It About Gay Men and Crystal Meth?

What Is It About Gay Men and Crystal Meth?

Meth has long been associated with gay men. The lost inhibitions induced by the drug are in such contradiction to the lifetime of suppression that most gay men have to adopt, that the appeal is magnetic. 

Read More
Comment

The information on this blog is provided for general informational purposes only and no psychotherapist-client relationship is formed nor should any such relationship be implied. The suggestions offered in this blog are just one perspective of many approaches to dealing with problems and should not be your only source when making life decisions. This website is not intended to replace professional mental health treatment.

The Fear of Bisexuality

The Fear of Bisexuality

Bisexuality doesn’t get as much attention as other sexual orientations. Even lesbian and gay people don’t often think about what it is like to be bisexual.

Read More
4 Comments

The information on this blog is provided for general informational purposes only and no psychotherapist-client relationship is formed nor should any such relationship be implied. The suggestions offered in this blog are just one perspective of many approaches to dealing with problems and should not be your only source when making life decisions. This website is not intended to replace professional mental health treatment.

Queer Identity: Finding a Label (or not) and Possibly, a Tribe

Queer Identity: Finding a Label (or not) and Possibly, a Tribe

How do you identify yourself?

Lesbian, dyke, gay, bisexual?

Read More
Comment

The information on this blog is provided for general informational purposes only and no psychotherapist-client relationship is formed nor should any such relationship be implied. The suggestions offered in this blog are just one perspective of many approaches to dealing with problems and should not be your only source when making life decisions. This website is not intended to replace professional mental health treatment.

So the guy you like just told you he’s HIV-positive — Now what?

So the guy you like just told you he’s HIV-positive — Now what?

You’re on cloud nine. He’s hot. The chemistry is right. The conversation flows. There’s nothing about him that annoys you. It’s so rare to find a mate with that perfect mix that you wonder what the catch is. Then–wham!–he tells you he’s HIV-positive.

Read More
1 Comment

The information on this blog is provided for general informational purposes only and no psychotherapist-client relationship is formed nor should any such relationship be implied. The suggestions offered in this blog are just one perspective of many approaches to dealing with problems and should not be your only source when making life decisions. This website is not intended to replace professional mental health treatment.