Becoming More Flexible and Living a Life that Matters

Becoming More Flexible and Living a Life that Matters

How do people get stuck? It starts with pain.

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The information on this blog is provided for general informational purposes only and no psychotherapist-client relationship is formed nor should any such relationship be implied. The suggestions offered in this blog are just one perspective of many approaches to dealing with problems and should not be your only source when making life decisions. This website is not intended to replace professional mental health treatment.

The Secret to a Better Gay Sex Life

The Secret to a Better Gay Sex Life

Here’s the big secret to better gay sex:

Be more selfish.

You don’t hear that a lot.

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The information on this blog is provided for general informational purposes only and no psychotherapist-client relationship is formed nor should any such relationship be implied. The suggestions offered in this blog are just one perspective of many approaches to dealing with problems and should not be your only source when making life decisions. This website is not intended to replace professional mental health treatment.

Gay Men Coming Out: Version 2.0

Gay Men Coming Out:  Version 2.0

Olympic skater Adam Rippon may be the only person who is comfortable being his gay self everywhere. At least that what it looks like on TV.  I admire him for it. 

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The information on this blog is provided for general informational purposes only and no psychotherapist-client relationship is formed nor should any such relationship be implied. The suggestions offered in this blog are just one perspective of many approaches to dealing with problems and should not be your only source when making life decisions. This website is not intended to replace professional mental health treatment.

Should My Therapist Look Like Me? Well That Depends

Should My Therapist Look Like Me?  Well That Depends

“Whew, I am so glad that they didn’t assign me one of those white girl therapists out there. I don’t want to tell them all of my business and they won’t understand me anyway.”

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The information on this blog is provided for general informational purposes only and no psychotherapist-client relationship is formed nor should any such relationship be implied. The suggestions offered in this blog are just one perspective of many approaches to dealing with problems and should not be your only source when making life decisions. This website is not intended to replace professional mental health treatment.

Gay Men and Perfectionism

 Gay Men and Perfectionism

Being perfect is one way to manage being an outsider in your own family, school, city, or country.

Feeling like an outsider is a pretty typical experience for young gay people. And too often they can also feel like they are gross, disgusting, or sick. It can be quite humiliating to grow up gay.

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The information on this blog is provided for general informational purposes only and no psychotherapist-client relationship is formed nor should any such relationship be implied. The suggestions offered in this blog are just one perspective of many approaches to dealing with problems and should not be your only source when making life decisions. This website is not intended to replace professional mental health treatment.

Open Gay Relationships: Video Blog

Open Gay Relationships: Video Blog

If you are in an open relationship it's likely you'll need some help figuring it out.  Here's an 8-minute video with some tips.

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The information on this blog is provided for general informational purposes only and no psychotherapist-client relationship is formed nor should any such relationship be implied. The suggestions offered in this blog are just one perspective of many approaches to dealing with problems and should not be your only source when making life decisions. This website is not intended to replace professional mental health treatment.

Gay Men, Texting, and 93% of Communication

Gay Men, Texting, and 93% of Communication

93% of communication is through your facial expression and tone of voice.

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The information on this blog is provided for general informational purposes only and no psychotherapist-client relationship is formed nor should any such relationship be implied. The suggestions offered in this blog are just one perspective of many approaches to dealing with problems and should not be your only source when making life decisions. This website is not intended to replace professional mental health treatment.

How To Keep A Gay Relationship Going After the Honeymoon

How To Keep A Gay Relationship Going After the Honeymoon

According to long-range studies, the romantic obsession stage only lasts an average of about two years.

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The information on this blog is provided for general informational purposes only and no psychotherapist-client relationship is formed nor should any such relationship be implied. The suggestions offered in this blog are just one perspective of many approaches to dealing with problems and should not be your only source when making life decisions. This website is not intended to replace professional mental health treatment.

Do You Choose Mean Gay Guys?

Do You Choose Mean Gay Guys?

We often are drawn to unkind people because our parents weren’t so kind to us.  In other words, they feel familiar.

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How To Spice Up a Gay Relationship: Video Blog

How To Spice Up a Gay Relationship: Video Blog

This 4-minute video blog will help you realize that your sexual fantasies aren't that weird.

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The information on this blog is provided for general informational purposes only and no psychotherapist-client relationship is formed nor should any such relationship be implied. The suggestions offered in this blog are just one perspective of many approaches to dealing with problems and should not be your only source when making life decisions. This website is not intended to replace professional mental health treatment.

The Shy Gay Guy

The Shy Gay Guy

Are you shy? If so, be forewarned: this is not an article about how to overcome shyness.

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The information on this blog is provided for general informational purposes only and no psychotherapist-client relationship is formed nor should any such relationship be implied. The suggestions offered in this blog are just one perspective of many approaches to dealing with problems and should not be your only source when making life decisions. This website is not intended to replace professional mental health treatment.

Why Gay Men Love Sex

Orgasm may be one of the only times we are fully present in the moment.

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The information on this blog is provided for general informational purposes only and no psychotherapist-client relationship is formed nor should any such relationship be implied. The suggestions offered in this blog are just one perspective of many approaches to dealing with problems and should not be your only source when making life decisions. This website is not intended to replace professional mental health treatment.

Does “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” Work in Open Gay Relationships?

Does “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” Work in Open Gay Relationships?

Sexual secrets can be hot, but they also keep us separate and disconnected from people we love.

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The information on this blog is provided for general informational purposes only and no psychotherapist-client relationship is formed nor should any such relationship be implied. The suggestions offered in this blog are just one perspective of many approaches to dealing with problems and should not be your only source when making life decisions. This website is not intended to replace professional mental health treatment.

The Horror of Gay Men and Femininity

The Horror of Gay Men and Femininity

At its core, gay male homophobia is caused by a fear of the feminine.

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The information on this blog is provided for general informational purposes only and no psychotherapist-client relationship is formed nor should any such relationship be implied. The suggestions offered in this blog are just one perspective of many approaches to dealing with problems and should not be your only source when making life decisions. This website is not intended to replace professional mental health treatment.

Can A Gay Relationship Survive an Affair? A Video Blog

Can A Gay Relationship Survive an Affair?  A Video Blog

Recovery from an affair is a lot of work. But it happens every day at the Gay Therapy Center. See how in this 5-minute video.

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The information on this blog is provided for general informational purposes only and no psychotherapist-client relationship is formed nor should any such relationship be implied. The suggestions offered in this blog are just one perspective of many approaches to dealing with problems and should not be your only source when making life decisions. This website is not intended to replace professional mental health treatment.

Lesbians, Gay Men, Bisexuals, and Transgender People: What If You Loved Yourself?

Lesbians, Gay Men, Bisexuals, and Transgender People: What If You Loved Yourself?

The concept of loving yourself has lost its power to inspire us because it was overused in cheesy popular media. 

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The information on this blog is provided for general informational purposes only and no psychotherapist-client relationship is formed nor should any such relationship be implied. The suggestions offered in this blog are just one perspective of many approaches to dealing with problems and should not be your only source when making life decisions. This website is not intended to replace professional mental health treatment.

Gay Men Being Needy

Gay Men Being Needy

If a man appears dependent or needy, then he’s a fag. It’s considered gross.

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The information on this blog is provided for general informational purposes only and no psychotherapist-client relationship is formed nor should any such relationship be implied. The suggestions offered in this blog are just one perspective of many approaches to dealing with problems and should not be your only source when making life decisions. This website is not intended to replace professional mental health treatment.

How to Have an Open Gay Relationship That Doesn't Hurt

How to Have an Open Gay Relationship That Doesn't Hurt

I think gay men might be the most sexually creative people in the world. I don’t have any research data to support this, but have you heard of San Francisco’s Folsom Street Fair? It’s the world largest celebration of sexuality, and it was created by gay men.

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The information on this blog is provided for general informational purposes only and no psychotherapist-client relationship is formed nor should any such relationship be implied. The suggestions offered in this blog are just one perspective of many approaches to dealing with problems and should not be your only source when making life decisions. This website is not intended to replace professional mental health treatment.

Gay Men: Are You Lazy?

When I hear the word “lazy’, I get very curious. Because essentially I don’t believe that laziness exists.

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The information on this blog is provided for general informational purposes only and no psychotherapist-client relationship is formed nor should any such relationship be implied. The suggestions offered in this blog are just one perspective of many approaches to dealing with problems and should not be your only source when making life decisions. This website is not intended to replace professional mental health treatment.

Gay Men in Mid-Life: Now What?

Gay Men in Mid-Life:  Now What?

You took the trip.  You ate the food.  You posted the photos.

And yet, you wonder: Is this all there is?

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The information on this blog is provided for general informational purposes only and no psychotherapist-client relationship is formed nor should any such relationship be implied. The suggestions offered in this blog are just one perspective of many approaches to dealing with problems and should not be your only source when making life decisions. This website is not intended to replace professional mental health treatment.